McNair: There's No Rematch This Time

July 4, 2009; Independence Day - A day of celebration and cookouts for most of us. On this day, a young man in the prime of his life, Steve McNair at the age of 36, lost his life. McNair was shot and killed by his girlfriend, 20-year-old Sahel Kazemi, who then shot herself in the head and died. Senseless in every stretch of the imagination. Why would McNair have a girlfriend when he had a wife: Mechelle? Why was the girlfriend so predisposed to murdering him? What horrible agony was she in that she was willing to plan to do this, buy a gun, commit a murder and then take her own life? What depth of despair and hopelessness would you have to feel in order to do something like this? I cannot even begin to understand. I just know that two young lives’ journeys are over. Poof! How many more will be haunted by this tragedy?

Approximately, July 10, 2009, Brazilian Police discovered the body of 37 year old Arturo Gatti in a hotel room at a resort/hotel in Brazil. His was a violent death that took place while allegedly taking a second honeymoon with his wife, 23 year old Amanda Rodrigues. The couple had a one year old son. Amanda first stated that she awoke at 600am on 7-11-09 and found Gatti, dead. However, she later admitted that the couple did have a fight on Friday night and that Gatti had pushed her. The police in Brazil have revealed that Gatti was strangled by a purse strap. Rodrigues is in custody. Not exactly the hoped for “get away weekend”. Again, what a senseless and needless tragedy. Anger turned to outrage, and then turned to death…and for what?

I am usually very reserved in making a judgment in cases like these. Possibly because these incidents happened within a week of each other, I feel compelled to comment. Regardless, to me, this comes down to a matter of faith. I pray for the surviving families of Steve McNair, Arturo Gatti and Sahel Kazemi. I pray that they have faith and belief in their God, especially now, when things look to be at their worst. I do not know how they feel because I have not lost a loved one due to a tragedy or crime. So all I can do is keep them in my prayers.

I pray for that one year old child of Arturo Gatti and Amanda Rodrigues. His father was killed and he will never know him. His mother committed the crime and her imprisonment will prevent him from knowing her. Some day he will learn the horrible truth of his heritage and what happened with his parents. Imagine the trauma that awaits this innocent one year old boy. I will not know how he will feel because I was raised by two loving parents. So all I can do is keep him in my prayers.

I also pray that the general public doesn’t remember this tragedy just because McNair was a 31 year NFL quarterback with 174 touchdown passes, 31,304 passing yards, 60.1 percent of completions, 3.590 rushing yards and 37 more individual touchdowns and an overall career QB Rating of 82.8. Remember that he was a man who paid the ultimate price for his decision to date another woman while he was still married.

McNair was a man who had filled the roles of a husband, father and son.McNair is survived by sons Junior, Steven, Tyler, Trenton and wife Mechelle. They had been married nearly 12 years. Was he wrong for having a girl friend? It violated his marriage vows. Was it reason enough to die? The fact that his girlfriend of 8 months thought he was in the last stages of divorce is sadly, a common scenario. A worldly, savvy, and in this case, famous man takes a liking to an attractive younger woman. He was 36, she was 20. He fulfilled her needs and she fulfilled his. But her expectations of the relationship did not equal his. Have other athletes or men empowered by wealth and fame taken advantage of women in similar circumstances? Absolutely. But it is still wrong and does not justify McNairs decision to date another woman while married to his wife. So, please remember that a man was cut down in the prime of his life, no matter what the reason. He leaves behind his own family and left them in a world of hurt, pain, anger and confusion that only they know.

Additionally, I pray that the public does not remember Arturo Gatti only for being one of the most exciting fighters of all time. Please don’t feel bad for his loss only because he fought professionally from 1991 to 2007. His record of 40 wins, 31by knockout and 9 losses does not speak to the intensity and violence he brought to the ring. You can respect the fact that he fought as a super featherweight and became champion and then fought in the lightweight and welterweight divisions as well. You cannot respect the fact that in March of 2009, we was charged with assaulting his wife to be, Amanda Rodrigues but did not appear in court. When he did appear in court in April, he was released on bail and ordered to stay 200 meters away from her. It does not matter how many “feet” that is, he could not go near the mother of his son. And during a second honeymoon, 3 months after this court hearing, they are together in a hotel room and his life violently ended. Remember that and remember that his wife is charged with first degree murder and their son will not get to be raised by his natural parents. Her purse strap had his blood on it. What did she do those 10 hours from the time he was killed to the time his body was found by police? Remember that three lives were ended that day. Gatti is dead, Rodrigues is charged with his murder and a son is left alone.

Is this justice? Was it fair? Did they have to die? No, no and no. The old saying of live by the sword; die by the sword has never been in play as much as it is in these two stories. Steve McNair lived a life of fame, fortune, special privileges, egotistic behavior and adoration. His need to have his ego fed at the risk of losing his wife and four sons cost him his life. He never stood a chance as it is speculated he was asleep on the couch when the gun shots were fired…four of them, twice in the head and twice in the chest. Still, there is no justice for a life taken.

Arturo Gatti lived a life of heart pounding excitement and violence. He beat other men with his hands for 16 years. In March of 2009, he assaulted his wife and was court ordered to not go within 656 feet of her. On the night of July 10th or morning of July 11th, something went horribly wrong. This time, Amanda beat Arturo to the punch. She strangled him to death with her purse strap. This doesn’t mean that all women should be made to have clutch purses only, but this is extreme. How scared of the recent assault was she that this argument got her adrenalin going so strong that she was able to choke her husband, a skilled and professional fighter, to death? Still, there is no justice for a life taken.

There will be no rematch to avenge this loss Arturo, this is and will be recorded as your biggest defeat ever.